Every year, Australians have a collective conversation about mental health. Posters go up in break rooms. Emails land in inboxes. Someone in the office organises morning tea. And millions of people hear the question: Are you OK?
It’s a beautiful initiative. Genuinely. The R U OK? campaign has done more to normalise conversations about mental health than almost anything else in this country. And for many people, being asked is enough the simple act of someone noticing and caring creates a lifeline that wasn’t there before.
But there’s a person this conversation doesn’t quite reach. And I see them in my Hamilton clinic regularly.
It’s the person who gets asked “Are you OK?” and wants to say no really, truly wants to say “no, I’m not, and I haven’t been for a while” but doesn’t. Because they don’t want to burden anyone. Because they’re not sure how to explain what’s wrong. Because the last time they opened up, someone said “just think positive” and it made them feel worse. Because admitting it out loud makes it too real.
Or maybe they do say no. Maybe they find the courage to be honest. And the person who asked listens, and cares, and then… what? “You should see someone.” But who? For what? Where do you even start when the problem isn’t a broken bone you can point to it’s a heaviness that follows you everywhere, a background noise that never quite turns off?
This piece is for that person. Not the campaign. Not the morning tea. The actual human being who is not OK and doesn’t know what to do about it.
The gap between awareness and action
Here’s what I’ve observed after years of working with people struggling with anxiety and depression in Brisbane: most of them knew they weren’t OK long before anyone asked. The problem was never awareness. It was knowing what to do with the awareness.
We’ve gotten very good at encouraging people to talk. What we haven’t gotten equally good at is telling them what happens after the talking.
A client I’ll call James a tradesman in his early forties, married, two kids told me he’d been asked “R U OK?” at a toolbox talk on a construction site. He’d smiled and said, “Yeah, mate, all good.” That night, he’d sat in his ute in the driveway for twenty minutes, unable to walk through the front door because the weight of everything he was carrying felt physically immobilising.
James wasn’t OK. He’d known it for months. But knowing you’re not OK and knowing how to become OK are very different problems.
By the time James called me, he’d been living with low-grade depression for over a year, layered with work stress, financial pressure, and a nagging anxiety that something bad was about to happen but he couldn’t identify what. He’d seen his GP, who’d offered medication. He’d considered counselling but his words “I’m not really the talk-about-my-feelings type.”
This is where hypnotherapy found its place. Not because James couldn’t talk. But because what he needed wasn’t more talking. It was access to the part of his mind that was running the programme keeping him stuck the subconscious patterns of worry, heaviness, and emotional shutdown that no amount of conscious conversation was reaching.
What “not OK” actually looks like
Depression and anxiety don’t always announce themselves dramatically. In fact, the versions I see most often are almost invisible from the outside. They look like:
Getting through the day without anything going wrong, but also without anything feeling good. Lying awake at 2am running through scenarios that haven’t happened and probably won’t. Snapping at people you love over trivial things and feeling ashamed about it thirty seconds later. Saying “I’m fine” so often it’s become automatic. Noticing you’ve stopped enjoying things you used to look forward to. Using alcohol, food, social media, or work to fill a space you can’t quite name. Feeling exhausted in a way that sleep doesn’t fix.
None of these are emergencies. That’s part of what makes them so insidious. They’re not dramatic enough to justify in your own mind seeking help. So they persist. And they accumulate. And slowly, imperceptibly, they become your normal.
Here’s what I want you to hear: “not OK” doesn’t have to mean crisis. It can mean grey. It can mean flat. It can mean quietly struggling while everyone around you assumes you’re coping. And that version of not OK deserves support just as much as the dramatic kind.
Why the subconscious holds the key
If you’ve ever wondered why you can’t just “snap out of it” why positive thinking, willpower, and keeping busy aren’t fixing the underlying feeling there’s a neurological reason.
Your subconscious mind runs roughly 90 to 95 per cent of your mental processing. It governs your emotional reactions, automatic behaviours, habitual thought patterns, and deeply held beliefs about yourself and the world. These patterns were largely formed early in life and have been running on autopilot ever since.
When your subconscious has learned through experience, observation, or absorption that the world is unsafe, that you’re not enough, that happiness is temporary and loss is permanent, those beliefs shape your emotional experience every single day. Your conscious mind might disagree entirely. But the conscious mind is outnumbered.
This is why the R U OK? question, as important as it is, can only go so far. Asking the question engages the conscious mind. Answering it honestly engages the conscious mind. But the thing making you not OK often lives deeper in the subconscious, where language and logic don’t have the same reach.
Hypnotherapy goes there. Not to bypass your defences, but to work with your subconscious gently, in a state of deep relaxation, to identify and update the patterns that are keeping you stuck. It’s not mysterious. It’s not magic. It’s a clinically supported approach that reaches the level where the real work needs to happen.
If you’re not OK, this is a place to start.
You don’t need to explain yourself perfectly. You don’t need a diagnosis. You just need to be willing. Call me on 0447 715 815 or email marie@hypnotherapyinbrisbane.com.au.
What actually happens when you pick up the phone
I know that for a lot of people especially people who’ve been telling themselves they’re fine for months the hardest part is making the first contact. So let me tell you exactly what happens.
You call or email. We talk. Not a clinical assessment, not a sales pitch a genuine conversation about what’s going on. I ask questions, mostly I listen. By the end of that conversation, I’ll tell you honestly whether I think hypnotherapy could help, and if I don’t think it’s the right fit, I’ll suggest what might be.
If we decide to go ahead, you come to my clinic in Hamilton (or we set up a Zoom session if you prefer). The first session includes a longer conversation and then the hypnotherapy itself. You’ll sit comfortably, I’ll guide you into a deeply relaxed state using my voice, and from there we work with your subconscious mind.
You’re aware the entire time. You can talk. You can stop. You’re in complete control. Most people describe it as the most relaxed they’ve felt in years.
Afterwards, you drive home. Or you make a cup of tea. Life goes on, but something has shifted underneath sometimes noticeably right away, sometimes over the following days.
James, the tradie I mentioned earlier? After three sessions, he told me: “I don’t sit in the ute anymore. I walk through the door. It sounds like nothing, but it’s everything.”
It is everything. And it started with someone who wasn’t OK being brave enough to do something about it.
For the person who wants to help
If you’re reading this because you asked someone “R U OK?” and they said no or because you can see that someone in your life is struggling here are a few things I’d gently suggest.
Don’t try to fix it. Just being present, without judgement, is more powerful than any advice you can give. Don’t tell them to “just think positive” or “try yoga.” They’ve probably tried. And hearing that makes them feel like they’re failing at being happy. Do let them know that professional support exists and that seeking it is a sign of strength, not weakness. Do offer practical help “Would you like me to help you find someone to talk to?” is more useful than “You should see someone.”
You can share this page with them, or suggest they call me on 0447 715 815. Sometimes knowing there’s a specific person they can contact is less overwhelming than the vague idea of “getting help.”
You don’t have to wait for someone to ask
The R U OK? campaign encourages people to ask the question. But you don’t need to wait for someone to ask it. You can ask it of yourself. And if the honest answer is no you can take the next step without anyone’s permission.
I see clients at my Hamilton clinic (Hamilton Health Hub, 33 Remora Road, Hamilton QLD 4007) and online via Zoom. I work with people from all over Brisbane, across Queensland, and internationally. Some come for anxiety. Some for depression. Some can’t quite name what’s wrong they just know they’re not OK. All of them are welcome.
Call me on 0447 715 815 or email marie@hypnotherapyinbrisbane.com.au.
You asked yourself the question. You know the answer. Now do something kind for yourself and make the call.
Frequently asked questions
I’m not in crisis is my situation “bad enough” for hypnotherapy?
You don’t need to be in crisis to benefit from hypnotherapy. Many of my clients come to me at the “I’m coping but something’s not right” stage. That’s actually an ideal time before things escalate. If you’re asking whether your situation warrants help, the answer is almost always yes.
I’ve never done hypnotherapy and I’m nervous. What will it feel like?
Most people describe it as deeply relaxing similar to the calm state just before sleep. You’re aware, you can speak, and you’re in complete control. It’s nothing like stage hypnosis. The overwhelming feedback I get is: “I wish I’d done this sooner.”
How many sessions will I need?
It varies. Some people experience a significant shift in one or two sessions. Others benefit from additional work. I’ll give you an honest assessment during our initial conversation.
Can hypnotherapy help if I don’t know what’s wrong I just feel off?
Yes. Many clients come to me without a specific diagnosis just a persistent sense that something isn’t right. Hypnotherapy works with your subconscious, which often knows exactly what’s going on even when your conscious mind can’t articulate it.
Is this covered by health insurance?
Many private health funds include clinical hypnotherapy. I’m a registered Health Fund Provider. Check your fund’s extras cover and I’ll provide receipts for claiming.